I have found the most wonderful website. Mindy Maudlin has created a place called the ”What If Up Club”. She talks about playing the “What If” game but instead of thinking the worst, she asks you to think about what is the BEST you could imagine. This is “What If Upping”.

It is a wonderful game. I have played it for most my life. Sitting around with friends or family and asking, “What If?” Ole and I would play it when we would drive some place.

• What If money weren’t an issue, what kind of car would you buy and why?
• What If you could live any place in the world, where would it be and why?
• What If you could have any job in the world, what would you do and why?
• What If you could meet any person, living or dead, who would it be and why?
• What If you could make love any place in the world, where would it be and why?

I mean, the list of ‘What If’ questions is a mile long and the conversations that would spring from one question was always a mind opener because we both saw and imagined something different.

We would talk, laugh and explore one fantasy after another. We played it a lot. Sometimes we would be snuggling on the couch and start the game of ‘what if’. Time would fly and we were having fun.

You might be thinking how cute, or how silly, but it is a useful tool. People in business play this game all the time. They try and look at different possibilities or solutions to different problems, products, and advertising. From the amount of consumerism, I would say it works wonders for them.

But I got to thinking, you can definitely use this in your relationship too:

• What if you could have the best possible relationship ever? What would it look like to you…to your partner?
• What if you and your partner could talk about everything openly and honestly without fear of being judged or abused in any form?
• What if you both could talk about what you want from your relationship and each other?
• What if you could share ALL your hopes, dreams and fears without fear of being judged or abused in any form?
• What if you could ask for emotional, physical and spiritual support from your partner?
• What if you could sit together and imagine your best relationship ever?

These are just a FEW of the ways you could play the “What If Up” game in your relationship. When you start playing, you will be able to come up with so many more topics of interest to explore and imagine together to make your Best Relationship Ever come true.

Just playing this game is a first step in that direction. You are opening up your creative minds and exploring other possibilities on many, many topics. As well, you are communicating your wants and needs emotionally, physically and spiritually.

This opens a whole new door in your relationship. You learn to playfully talk with each other about your deepest desires, feelings and needs without pressure on either of you. You get to communicate with your lover on a whole different level.

You get to learn about each other in a different way.

Not only is this fun but you will hear things about your lover that he may not have talked about before. Because this is a game, there is no pressure to say the right thing and there are no expectations. There is no fear that you will say something that will disappoint your sweetheart. It is just a game.

Be adventurous and play the “What If Up” game with your lover. This is for fun. This is to come closer together. This is to connect to each other with out expectations or fear.

So…What If you could have the BEST RELATIONSHIP EVER? What would it look like?

Passionate regards….Brenda

Romantic Getaways! They are rejuvenating to our senses. They add spice to our love making. They put a little intrigue into our daily humdrum. Romantic Getaways are fabulous! What more needs to be said? Lots!

There is no right or wrong place to go for a romantic rendezvous. The most important ingredients are to have an open mind and heart to allow the fantasy to carry us away. Expect nothing more and nothing less.

Romantic Getaways – Part 1  showed how an intended romantic trip that went a little haywire still produced the desired results for both of us because we were both open to whatever happened. Neither of us had any expectations, just love in our hearts.

My post Give Them What They Want showed how good intentions can go extremely wrong. Just because I thought it would be a wonderful evening getaway for love and romance, it was definitely not his. I satisfied my desires and ideals when I should have thought more about what would have turned him on.

You have to think about who your partner is, what they like, what experiences have they had in the past.

You would never take a city girl out camping in a tent in the woods with bears if she is not that kind of person. At least not the first time, unless of course she has expressed some interest in sleeping in a tent. The better you know each other, the more you can expand your romantic horizons.

Romantic  Getaways are fun to plan and fun to experience. When you are planning with your lover in mind, their ideals and dreams and what excites them, you can’t go wrong. THEY are the focus. The desired result is love, romance and a wonderful experience. There is nothing better.

Some years ago, I had set up a weekend away at a nice resort in a town a couple hours from our house. I told Ole we had to go see the publishers because they had called and there was a problem with something. I was very vague and acted a little scattered.

I said I would drive cause he had been working all day and could just relax. He had a million questions and I just kept telling him I wasn’t sure what the problem was. They just called and asked if we could drive over and see them.

They lived in the next town over and when we passed it, Ole got a little grin on his face and asked what was I up to? I just smiled and said I was kidnapping him for a couple days and he should just lean back and enjoy the ride. I didn’t spill the beans about where we were going. It was more fun for him to try to figure it out as we drove.

I had reserved the hotel a couple days before. I made arrangements for our cats to be taken care of. Then I packed our bags and put them in the truck while he showered. I loved surprising him but he loved being surprised. If he didn’t, this may not have turned out as fun and wonderful as it did.

Romance is in the heart of the beholder. A dream getaway to a quiet remote island maybe your idea but not so appealing to someone that lives to party and loves the night life.

When you have lived the dream in your first Romantic Getaway, the second comes easier because your mind opens up to other ways to wow your lover. As well, your lover opens up to other new experiences. They begin to get excited about the next time because the first was so great. They also begin to think about how to wow you.

Romantic Getaways! They create blissful feelings; feelings of love, joy, happiness, contentment, excitement, and the list goes on.

Be open to the fantasy. Be open to the dream. Be open in your thoughts and hearts. Romance spreads from you heart to your head and back again. Let every day be a Romantic Getaway.

Passionate regards….Brenda

What does that mean to you to go on a Romantic Getaway? Take the weekend and go to a fancy 5 star hotel? Find a wonderful spa for you and your lover to indulge your every pampered thought and desire? Me too!

How about a camping trip when it is a little too cold for camping?

Imagine this…

It was end of April in the Rocky Mountains and Ole, my husband, came to pick me up from work. He sported a Cheshire grin and I said what’s up. He said he had a surprise for me. He was taking me away for a night of fun and passion.

I was excited. I thought hotel? Jacuzzi? Romantic Dinner? All of the above? Loving in luxury is always a favorite of mine.

Luxury it wasn’t. We started by stopping at Subway Subs for a snack for the road. Ole said he had supper under control but it would be a little while before we would eat so we should have something to tide us over till then.

When we settled back into the truck Ole ginned again and said he had been shopping. Now we are back on track I thought. Maybe some new love toys to use in our beautiful hotel room. I said great, where? His answer: Canadian Tire! I knew that this was not going to be what I expected.

We were going camping! We drove for about 3 hours then started to look for a secluded spot. Ole wanted a place where we can just set up. Not a campground with other people. Someplace we could relax and spend time together. 

We found a little clearing on the side of the road. It had a small stream running by it. It was so pretty and quiet. We set up the tent and pumped up the new air mattress from Canadian Tire. We had to have a tarp over the fire pit as it started to rain a little. Ole had bought a couple really nice steaks and made up potatoes with carrots and onions in a foil pouch. What a wonderful meal.

Ole also bought some fishing equipment. I had never fished before in my life. But he thought it would be fun and something relaxing to do together. And we could do this while our supper cooked. So we put on our insulated coveralls and boots because with night coming and the rain, it was getting cold, and we started fishing.

He was right. It was a great way to connect and enjoy time together. Something we had not tried before.  We didn’t fish long as it was getting dark and we thought we could snuggle around the fire and eat the wonderful meal that he had prepared for us. It was delicious. Good food. Good wine. Great company! What more could I ask for?

After supper we were feeling a little amorous and decided we should try out our new bed. The mood didn’t last long once we started taking off our clothes. IT WAS COLD! We decided it might be best to leave our insulated coveralls on and go to sleep. Then we can share a great breakfast of coffee cooked on the open fire and bacon and eggs.

When the air in the mattress cools off it gets really cold! We tossed and turned and fidgeted until 3 or 4 am. I asked if he was sleeping and he said no. I said why don’t we go home? Ole said he was just thinking the same thing. It is no easy task to take down a camp site at 4am in the dark and the tent is covered in a sheet of ice.

When we got home around 7am, we took a long hot shower together. Crawled into bed and made love. We were content, warm, happy and in love. It was a wonderful romantic getaway.

Romantic getaways are what you make them. This could have been a disaster if all I did was complain and crab about the cold, the rain and camping. But Ole took such pleasure in organizing this trip and was so excited to do this FOR me, I was swept off my feet with his tender gesture.

Be open to the romance in the situation. Open your eyes and your heart to see the love and the fantasy in the moment. You will be so very happy that you did.

Passionate regards….Brenda